Pay Attention


I don't want to be so judgemental.

This is what I know - it is when I am not taking good care of myself that it hits.

When I am tired, or unhappy with something in my life, irritability replaces patience. Judgement replaces connection. If I am not in a healthy relationship with an idea bigger than myself and my desires and my agenda, I am off center. I am prone to be a jerk.

We are moving into a period of time as a country where we must take better care of ourselves. We must connect with each other across perceived differences. We must abandon judgement and choose to experience each other. Listen, really listen to each other. Have conversations and validate each other with undivided attention. We may never understand and we don't have to.

We grow in the company of others, when we allow them to be themselves. Find the application or program in your human computer that judges. Put it in the trash, or at the very least become conscious of when it begins and stop it.

Here's a template I try to use: Is what I'm about to say KIND, NECESSARY and TRUE? If it's not all three, keep it. Continue to craft it or let it go.

I recognize that when I am judging, or being flippant, gossipy or sarcastic... it has nothing to do with the person I'm spouting it off at or about. It has everything to do with how I feel about me at that moment. I don't want to appear that miserable. It's transparent. If I'm an asshole I'm unhappy. Simple. I want to be at peace.

Pay attention. I am responsible.


What if we proactively began to build community in our country in ways we hadn't before? What if we realize that we can't take for granted the freedoms we have to love each other? What if we begin, each one of us, to talk to each other? When judgement about hairstyle, religious beliefs, outfit, dialect, skin color, choice of partner... when these things try to incite judgement, pay attention. Move it to the side and listen. We don't need to argue, we don't need to prove. We just need to listen. There is room for both of us here and we are responsible for each other.

Let's move into today in Active Love. Say hello to people you wouldn't usually say hello to.

Notice your own judgemental thoughts. Pay attention. See similarities among us. Everyone is someone eases mother or daughter or son or brother or father... LOOK. Pay attention. Take care of. Love.


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